In January 2020 when I was 14, I was figuring out who I was and what gender I was into. Turns out I’m bisexual.  

Around this time of me figuring out what gender I was into, the weather outside was cold but at the same time, it was sunny. The cold weather made me feel sad and hurt in some way, but the sunny weather made me feel okay. 

When I was in the process of figuring out my sexuality, I remember always feeling overwhelmed. I felt like I wasn’t able to talk to anyone. I felt like I was stuck in a bubble, and I couldn’t find a way out of that bubble.

I had a crush on this girl. She was my best friend at the time. I had told her I liked her, but she never rejected me or told me she liked me at all. After that, I listened to mostly sad music to let go of those feelings I had stuck inside.

Coming out wasn’t really much of an issue for me. Most of the people I talked to at that time were very supportive.   

At first, though, I was really scared. I didn’t know how people would react or what they would say. I had thought that people would judge me and people would tell me, “Oh, you can’t be that. You’re so beautiful the way you are.”

But after all, everything went fine.

Coming out isn’t something you should do if you’re not ready. 

Coming out is something that has to be done on your terms. 

Never let someone in your life force you to come out. 

Because honestly…

When you come out, you might be judged by the people around you. 

And if I’m being honest, luckily for me, I didn’t have to deal with judgemental people.

But I do know some people out there do get judged. 

That’s not okay. I think those people who get judged should make a change.

Everyone should be treated equally. 

If any of you are going through an experience like this and are trying to decide whether to come out to your family or wait…first of all, I suggest you tell someone you trust and you think will be supportive and support you through everything. Also make sure they have time to talk to you because honestly, you might really need it.

In the meantime, I still have my “Feeling lost & confused” playlist on Spotify to make me feel better.